What to Do When Your Girlfriend Stops Loving You
Right now you
might be feeling helpless and maybe even a little bit hopeless about the
possibility of making your girlfriend fall in love you again, especially if
she’s been saying things like, “I don’t feel the same anymore” or “I don’t know
if I want to be with you anymore.”
The good news
is that you can change how she feels and get her to fall in love with you again
even harder this time.
As you will
discover from the video above, just because your girlfriend has stopped loving
you, it doesn’t mean she is going to be stuck in that state of mind forever.
When you make
her feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you, she will naturally
reconnect with her feelings of love for you.
Note: If she
is now your ex girlfriend and you’re trying to get her back, then watch this:
So, if you’re
wondering what to do when your girlfriend stops loving you, then keep reading
and I’ll explain how to fix the problem…
Avoid Making These Mistakes
When a guy
begins to worry about losing his girlfriend, he will often begin making
mistakes that will turn her off even more and push her further away.
So, if you’re
concerned about your girlfriend not loving you the same way anymore, here are
some things that you should avoid doing if you want to change how she feels
right and make her love you again.
Asking her why
It’s normal
for a guy to want to know what he has done to cause his girlfriend to stop
loving him, and it probably seems quite obvious that the best person to ask
would be her.
Yet, asking a
woman, “Why don’t you love me anymore? Just tell me what I have to do to get
you to love me again,” will only make it clear to her that he hasn’t been
paying attention to the warning signs she has been sending him for some time.
A woman doesn’t
just fall out of love with her man; it is usually a gradual process that
happens over weeks, months or even years.
Along the way
she will argue, fight and say things that she hopes will get through to him to
let him know how unhappy she is feeling.
She won’t sit
him down and teach him how to be the man she needs because that is not a role
that a girlfriend wants to be burdened with for life.
She wants a
ready-made man who already knows how to make a woman fall more deeply in love
with him over time.
If her man
doesn’t know how to do that, she wants him to figure it out on his own, rather
than expecting her to take on a role as a teacher, big sister or mother figure
in his life.
Asking his
girlfriend why she doesn’t love him anymore, is like saying to her, “I never
noticed what was happening between us and I really have no idea what I did
wrong. Can you please spell it out for me? I don’t know how to be the man you
need. I need you to teach me and help me become a real man. Please guide me and
be my mentor.”
At this stage
of the relationship, his girlfriend is already feeling little or no respect for
him as a man, so by him asking her to explain what he did wrong only makes her
think, “If he doesn’t understand what he needs to do, then I don’t want to have
to be the one teaching him. I don’t want to mother him and teach him how to be
a man in a relationship.”
She needs him
to figure things out by himself, without her having to hold his hand and guide
him.
If she has to
teach him how to grow up and be at her level of maturity, she won’t be able to
respect him and without respect, she won’t be able to properly feel attracted
to him or feel excited to be in love with him.
Whining, begging, pleading or crying
It’s normal
for a guy to feel sad, hurt and emotional when he discovers that his girlfriend
doesn’t love him anymore.
However, the
worst reaction he can have is to whine, cry or beg her to change her mind.
Why?
When a woman
stops loving a man, it’s because at some point during their relationship she
stopped feeling respect for him, and this then led her to lose attraction for
him and finally fall out of love with him.
If he then
confronts her with tears and whining (like a boy would do to gain the pity of
his mother), she will lose even more respect for him.
A woman wants
to know that her man is emotionally strong enough to handle any situation, no
matter how challenging.
If a guy
breaks down, cries or begs for a second chance with her, rather than think, “Ah,
poor guy, he really looks so miserable. Maybe I should give him another chance;
after all he seems so lost and sad,” she thinks, “I never realized he was so
weak. I think it would be better for me to break up with him and find myself a
guy who is emotionally strong and can handle his problems like a real man. I
don’t want to be stuck with a guy like this. What if I get pregnant to him? I
will be stuck with him for life now. I’ve got to get away from him while I
still can.”
So, whatever
you do, just don’t make the mistake of seeking her pity by showing her how
emotionally sensitive, insecure or hurt you are.
That is not
going to make her love you again and will only cause her to fall further out of
love with you.
If you want
to get your girlfriend to fall in love with you again, you have to make her
feel respect for you as a man by being a man that she can look up to, not a guy
that she has to look down on.
If you’ve
already made the mistake of getting emotional and even crying or begging her to
change her mind; it’s okay. You can still turn it around and make her see you
with fresh eyes.
From this
point forward you just have to focus on regaining her respect and attraction
for you by being a man that she can look up to and respect, and her feelings of
love will naturally follow.
Trying to convince her to change her mind.
Many guys
make the mistake of assuming that when a woman says, “I don’t love you
anymore,” she will change how she feels if he just promises to change.
Yet, he will
most-likely have made promises about changing before, which he wasn’t able to
follow through on.
When she gave
him another chance, he slowly reverted back to being his old self and making
the same mistakes, hoping that she would just put up with it this time and not
complain any further.
Here’s the
thing…
When a woman
stops loving her man, she doesn’t want to hear empty promises.
She wants to
be able to see, feel and experience him in a different way (via his behavior,
actions and communication style), before she will believe that he’s really
changed and thus open herself up to the idea of loving him again.
If a guy
makes promises and doesn’t keep them, it only adds another reason why she can’t
respect him.
In the past,
a woman had to remain a virgin until marriage and then stick with her man even
if she was unhappy, because it was shameful to get a divorce.
However, in
today’s world, women are free to get in and out of relationships until they
find the right man for them.
If you
currently aren’t the right man for your girlfriend, you need to start fixing
your issues (e.g. insecurity) and improve your ability to make her feel
respect, attraction and love for you.
If you don’t
do that, you might have to face the dreaded talk with your girlfriend where she
starts off by saying, “We need to talk” and then proceeds to say, “I don’t want
to be with you anymore. I am leaving you.”
You can stop
it before it gets to that point, but you have to be willing to fix your issues
and improve your ability to make her feel the way she really wants to feel.
Identify the Real Reasons Why She Stopped Loving You and Fix Those Things
To get your
girlfriend to respect you again, you have to show her that you now fully
understand what caused her to stop loving you in the first place (e.g.
insecurity, taking her for granted, being too clingy, having commitment issues,
not being enough of a man for her).
If you’re
unsure about what caused your girlfriend to lose respect, attraction and love
for you, here are some questions that will help you gain clarity:
- Have you been making her feel loved and appreciated in the relationship, or have you been making her feel taken for granted (e.g. expecting her to do certain things without helping out, not noticing when she did something nice for you, placing more importance on being with your friends than her)?
- Do you have a clear purpose and direction in life that you are following through on with determination, or have you been using her and the relationship as an excuse to hide from your true potential as a man?
- Have you been kind, loving and supportive towards her, or have you been criticizing or belittling her too much?
- Are you a strong, confident man she can rely on, or have you insecure, clingy and needy?
- Did you make her feel girly and feminine in contrast to your masculinity, or does she feel like more of a friend to you, or worse – does she feel like more of the man (more dominant, more emotionally strong) in the relationship?
These are
just a few reasons why your girlfriend might have stopped loving you.
When you can
identify the real reasons, you can then take proper action to fix those things.
You will then
begin to offer her what she really wants, rather than what you think she might
want.
For example:
If one of the reasons why a woman stopped loving her man was because he wasn’t
living up to his true potential as a man, she’s not going to care if he’s
promising her more time together, or more romantic dinners.
She is going
to want to see him starting to live up to his true potential, so she can trust
him to guide him and her to a better future.
If he takes
action towards improving himself, (e.g. by applying for a better job, trying to
get promoted, going to university to improve his qualifications, working
towards achieving certain goals) she will see that not only has he really
understood what was bothering her, he is also man enough to do something
positive about it and this will attract her and make her feel respect for him
like never before.
She will then
begin to reconnect with her old feelings of love for him, but this time it will
be stronger because it will based on deeper feelings of respect and attraction
for him.
Her Love for You Isn’t Really Dead
Right now,
your girlfriend might be saying, “Leave me alone! I just don’t love you
anymore,” but it doesn’t that mean her love for you is dead.
Instead, it
simply means she doesn’t feel like she can love you right now.
Her love is
somewhere in the background but, right now, she’s not willing to let herself
feel that love for you because she’s focusing all her feelings on the negative
things about you and your relationship.
When you
change those negative things about yourself and start offering her what she
really wants, she won’t be able to keep that love buried inside her for long.
When she sees
that you are now the kind of man she can respect and look up to, her guard will
naturally go down and she will start feeling attraction for you again.
She will then
begin to reconnect with the love she felt for you, but this time it will be
even stronger because she will believe in you as a man and feel a deeper
respect and attraction for you as a result.
So, when you
woke up this morning wondering about what to do when your girlfriend stops
loving you, and feeling like you might not be able to change how she feels, as
you can now see, it’s not impossible or even difficult.
You can do
this.
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