Five Tips to Help in Putting the Pleasure Back Into Sex

Sexual health isn’t just about the absence of disease, it’s also about having a positive and respectful approach to sex and having pleasurable and safe sexual experiences as focused on in Sexual Health Week.

Dr Lyndsey Myskow, who leads sexual health and gender clinic, gives tips on putting the pleasure back into sex. Dr Myskow has been a sex therapist for more than 30 years and is one of Scotland’s leading experts in the field. So who better for our magazine to ask for the top five tips for a good sex life and help in putting the pleasure back into sex.

1. Be open and honest with your partner

Sex is an important part of a couple’s life, and whether it’s good or not good, or frequent or less so, we often feel embarrassed speaking about it – even with our partners.
The first thing you need to do is open up and chat about what you expect sexually from each other. If you don’t like the way your partner does something, or you don’t like a particular sexual position, be honest. It won’t just improve your sex life – it’ll improve your relationship too.

2. Understand each others’ needs – and compromise

When you and your partner both know what turns each other on in the bedroom, it’s safe to say you’re going to enjoy sex more. So make sure you ask them what they like and what they don’t like. But don’t forget to compromise – sex should never be about just one person getting everything they want.

3. Spend some quality time together

Trying to juggle your work with your personal life is hard enough, never mind having to think about sex too. But no matter how busy you are, it’s important to spend some quality alone time with your partner.
Whether it’s going for a romantic meal or going to the cinema, or simply getting out the house for a little while, these moments can reignite the spark and help turn your relationship around.

4. Try something new

This might be an obvious one, but when it comes to the bedroom, don’t be afraid to try new things. When couples are together for a long time, sex can understandably lose its sparkle, so set some time aside for experimentation.
This could be as simple as mixing up how, when or where you usually have sex, or something a little more adventurous like using sex toys or exploring your secret sexual fantasies.

5. Don’t ignore problems

Because people are often so embarrassed to talk about sex, a lot of potentially serious problems can get swept under the carpet. For example, erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation are just two common conditions that can affect people’s sex lives.